Tesla's Second-Generation Robot Can Do So Many Useful Things Like Rotate Eggs And Replace The Company's Factory Workers

Tesla’s second-gen Optimus robot is the biggest news in tech since Mark Zuckerberg grew legs in the Metaverse. Elon Musk claims this robot will eventually account for the “majority of Tesla’s long-term value.” Considering where Tesla was with the robot at its AI day last year, Optimus has made big steps forward, as the new model is faster, lighter, more agile, and uses delicate sensors in its fingers to pick up fragile things like eggs without cracking them.

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In the video Tesla released on Twitter Wednesday, Optimus 2.0 is a much more polished version, with a sleeker case, and even more ominous blank expressionless face. Tesla says the new bot is 30 percent faster than the model it replaces, and it has lost 22 pounds, though most of the video focuses on the new bot’s increased hand dexterousness.

“Optimus is not a deep thinker at this point,” said Musk back in May. “Optimus is still figuring out how to do basic stuff. It couldn’t cook some eggs or something quite yet. We need to get Optimus to the point where it has reasonable agility and can do basic things. We’re aiming for it to start off doing simple tasks that are boring and repetitive, or dangerous – basically, jobs people don’t wanna do. That’s our goal, and I’m confident we’ll achieve that goal.”

Optimus will allegedly use the same “FSD” software as Tesla adopts in its cars, and was responsible for the recall of 2 million cars. Elon says that he plans for Tesla to build millions of these robots, and every home will eventually be equipped with a robot butler or “catgirl” sex partner. Back in October of 2022, Elon claimed that ‘production’ for Optimus could begin as soon as 2023, but obviously that hasn’t happened, and even this new model isn’t anywhere near production ready. Elon has a long history of over promising and under delivering. At least this one can dance, and it isn’t just Grimes in a body suit.

Screenshot: Tesla

Comparing this model back to back with its forebears, it looks impressive; stack Optimus up against the running, backflipping, parkour robots that Boston Dynamics is producing, however, and it already looks like Tesla is behind the eight ball.

I’m not confident that the world’s richest man is all that interested in relieving the workforce of jobs “people don’t wanna do.” These robots don’t necessarily need to be able to run or jump to assemble cars, so I’m afraid that these bots will be used to reduce Tesla’s workforce to a minimum. Robots can’t unionize. If these robots get to a point where they can reliably operate the Tesla factory, Elon will finally be alone in his chocolate factory with hundreds of robo Oompa-loompas.