Britney Spears Tells Cop She Was Driving Poorly Because She Had To Pee

Screenshot: California Highway Patrol

‘Princess of pop’, eight-time Grammy Award winner, and knife dancer Britney Spears was pulled over and ticketed last month for allegedly passing on a double yellow lined road near her Southern California home. In a frantic interaction with the officer, Spears explains that she was rushing home because she had to ‘tee tee’. When it was revealed that she didn’t have any form of identification, the officer delivered a ticket for the infraction.

2023 Range Rover Sport | Quick Drive

The icon of a generation has been pulled over before in the same area by the same police officer two times previously this year, according to the cop’s claims in the ‘body worn video’ account. It’s tough to tell exactly what she’s saying to the police officer, but I think early in the conversation she says something very funny; “It feels like my butt is about to pop out my nose.”

We’ve all been there, right? You felt okay when you passed the last exit, but didn’t realize you had thirty miles until the next rest area, so you’re really puckered by the time you get there? Yeah, that’s happened to me. I’ve been desperate enough to want to pass on a double yellow, but I don’t recommend doing it.

The singer’s new white Mercedes SL63 AMG is basically a staple of her persona at this point, having driven Mercedes SLs basically without fail since she started driving. The singer gained something of a notoriety for erratic driving in LA in the early 2000s at the height of her career, then in her R129-generation SL500, which was lampooned in 2004’s Seed Of Chucky. She later had an R23-generation SL before getting her current R232 Mercedes-AMG SL63. She’s also owned a variety of other Mercedes vehicles, including G-Wagens, CLKs, and even an SLR McLaren.

Chucky Kills Britney Spears | Seed Of Chucky (2004)

In case Brit Brit—or a member of her staff—is reading this, please take the following advice into consideration. Never talk to a cop beyond “Yes, sir” or “No, sir”. Keep your hands on the steering wheel at all times, unless instructed to do otherwise. Keep a copy of your license and registration in every vehicle you own, so you can never be caught without it. I’ve interacted with cops enough that my heart jumped when she reached into the glovebox with a quick motion. You never know what is going to make a cop “fear for their life” and it’s best to not give them an excuse to bring out their weapon. Slow, measured reactions and verbal confirmation of what you’re doing when you do it are best practices. Even if you’re a highly recognizable pop star.